Let us know about free updates
Simply sign up for Work & Careers Myft Digest and it will be delivered directly to your inbox.
Message from Rutherford Hall Archives, Critical Communication Strategists
Whatsapp to Stephen: I have a small boon to Bigco’s Alice. She is worried about potential exposure from the left-handed band signed by the music department. Slimes and carbuncles, I think they are called. Some sort of punk/rap/grime/glam rock collective. Apparently they are embarrassed by what shareholders dislike.
Whatsapp to Stephen: You know, refund the police, bomb Israel, reduce welfare payments for disabled people. Normal left agenda.
From:rutherford@monkwellstrategy.com
To: alice@bigco.net
Hello Alice, I understand your concerns, but I think the problem with fwiw, slime and carbuncles is not that they are nasty and slogan-like left-handed, but a boring flock of left-handed people with a mild profile and modest sales. There is nothing to lift them up from the crowd. The reason for your difficulties with shareholders and the media is that the revenue they generate does not justify the deterioration.
I recommend a different approach. If that doesn’t work, you can always drop it later. The best Rutherford
Strava, Comcidenham Hill, Brighton 3 hours 04m from London, Aljubailer/Bodaloop – 42 minutes
From:rutherford@monkwellstrategy.com
To: alice@bigco.net
This is the plan. The most valuable currency in modern media is attention, and the best way to get it is rage. It’s great news that they’re in Glastonbury. We need them to be very shocking. Downloads should rise exponentially, and there are cutting edge bands in the book. Can you connect me with them? The best Rutherford
Find me on Strava. . .

Whatsapp to Slime: I don’t think free Palestine will do the job if you want to make a splash. Frankly, “f***Palestine” is more edge-aged, but that’s not the demographic we want. If you want to go down the Gaza route, you have to be much more aggressive.
whatsapp to slime: No, I absolutely do not question the urgency or integrity of your beliefs. I’m working on ways to expand them. You have a global audience. Please use it.
Whatsapp to Slime: What do you think about “Let’s double Israel as the core and turn Tel Aviv towards the Rub”? “And anyway, the flags of Hamas and Iranian revolutionary security guards are one of the good guys.
whatsapp to slime: Disaster. The truly ferocious boys have just given the “Hamas Embrace” chant. You need to increase the volume. What about Firebomb starmes?
Whatsapp to Alice: Your boy has come for us, let’s cook now. I know of Tory lawmakers jumping to this.
Whatsapp to Freddie: Are you watching Glastonbury? Have you seen what slime and carbank from this band said? Tory needs to slap this. And it was live on the BBC too.
WhatsApp to Alice: Have you seen the news? This is what I call a precision strike. There are all sorts of attacks on slimes. He appears to be fighting the entire facility. Punk Marketing Rock.
whatsapp to slime: Don’t worry, we will get you a lawyer. More importantly, you’ve heard calls all over the world. You need to keep swa arrogant. Stay rebellious. Please send us a telegraph on the front page of the email every day. PS: I think your downloads are also skyrocketing – people want to hear what you have to say.
WhatsApp to Alice: You need to continue with this.
whatsapp to jill@guardian: Here is a great editorial. Instead of getting mad with slime and carbuncles, get mad about what’s going on in Gaza.
WhatsApp to Tim@TheteLegraph: Seriously you guys need to keep this up. A bundle of bandwagons signing awakened virtues of left-handed people who probably hate Britain. Your head needs to roll.
whatsapp to jim@thetimes: Seriously, outrageous comment Shocker punk rocker. This is a great opportunity for lofty leaders in classical era traditions to suggest that we will regain our perspective.
From:rutherford@monkwellstrategy.com
To: alice@bigco.net
The two draft statements are ready. A: Bigco never tolerate offensive comments by Slime and Carbuncle, but the Rock Group has always challenged social norms. We support the band’s right to highlight perceived injustice.
B: Bigco strongly supports the freedom and integrity of musicians, but a set of artistic differences has led us to one company with Slime and Carbuncle. Future inquiries should be introduced to the band.
I’m glad that this worked. Don’t be enthusiastic about cutting the cord when you need it. These guys are on sale now. They’ll be fine. Best R
Find me. . .

Stephen from Whatsapp: Yeah, it worked like a dream. Sometimes the old songs are still the best. But with your new client, I have to keep you apart. I’m not sure if this strategy works for Challenger Bank.
Message retrieved by Robert Elimsley